Do you want this social media to be for your family to use only with family members or for them to use with family and beyond?
Revolt could be good as a local family group chat if you like the discord style. You’ve probably already tried it but Pixelfed/mastodon/misskey sound like the easiest to get family on board with and seem like they would be good family social media platforms IMO.
How did we see what the oom killer was killing before? Getting a notification is a great change because I had no idea how this was checked